Conversation with Jandro Cisnero
Written By Milton Young
Today on the podcast we welcome Jandro Cisneros. Despite his difficult childhood growing up in a home filled with domestic violence, high pressure, mental abuse, and physical fatigue, he kept going. Years later, through the support of his superhero Mother, matched with perseverance, hard work, and determination, Jandro has found his purpose and is thriving in it. Join us as we discuss his journey and the impactful role his superhero Mother played in his tremulous path to success, happiness and resolve.
Key Points From This Episode
Growing up without a father and the impacts it had on his childhood
How imitating his Superhero mother inspired him to be a hero
The impact of investing 15 years into therapy
The power of imitation and the long term effects
Finding love and happiness after pain and suffering
The true power of psychoanalysis
Finding yourself through knowing yourself
The process of finding your purpose
Finding the courage to standing up to your bullies
The importance of being who you are not who others expect you to be
Quotables
“If you want to go fast go alone, but if you want to go far, go together” - Jandro Cisneros
“So basically social artists are people who use creative skills to work with people, organizations in the community to affect change. So basically like while a traditional artist uses their creative skills to express their take on the world, a social artists artist puts their skills to use to help promote and improve communities.” - Jandro Cisneros
“There's no awareness. Like there's no way someone's going to teach you how to deal with yourself. So there's no school and that's the most difficult part because there's no school and everyone is so individual so unique, so amazing that the only person that can master yourself is yourself.” - Jandro Cisneros
Milton: [00:00:00] All right. Welcome to the good podcast. I'm your host and Milton young. And today we're here with a very special guest Nigel Reisner.
Milton: Mr. Nigel. What's good?
Nigel: [00:00:14] What's good for me that I did. I live in-person presentation this morning. I saw human beings. I was physically in a room with people that's only my fifth and a year of being in a room with live people. I've done 142 zoom presentations. I've done five live presentations. So what was good is that the world is beginning to change. I've had my first vaccination. I have my second in three weeks time, I have booked a summer vacation. My 36th wedding anniversary is next week. I've just become a grandfather.
Milton: [00:00:54] Life is pretty good. That is excellent. That is excellent. So I do want to ask you a [00:01:00] question because I've seen you perform on stage and the energy that you cast onto the rest of the audience and the way that you interacted. Probably one of the only speakers that I see that it's totally interactive almost the whole entire time. So how has that changed now that you're doing it on zoom?
Nigel: [00:01:18] Okay, so I have a Pash, sorry. I have a fetish, the PVC. Okay. Vision and communication. And if you are not passionate, when you are communicating your core subjects, you guys are right talking about if you know your why I don't ever use that language, but if you believe in your subject, And, you know, it can make a difference, even though I can't make the difference. I can share information for you to make the difference. And I look into the soul of your eyes. Your eyes are the windows to your soul, so I can look in your eyes and on zoom, I can get really close. I can tell you didn't shave that well this morning [00:02:00] I can see close to you, which I would not able to do if I was on stage. So on zoom, you've got an opportunity to really get close. Now on Saturday, I did a presentation with 200 screens. If you go on my Instagram, you'll see a picture where I had 200 screens and I could occasionally bring someone on to share the screen with me. I may have no idea when it was going to be. So I had people on the edge of their seats. Cause I might say Milton, come and join me and the panic, but he meant to be alive all the time. And I had 199 people who were beautiful. So I couldn't hear them, but anybody I could bring them onto the audience. So I always want to involve the audience and do something. Get ready for this new world. That's called entertainment, entertainment. Okay. So I need to entertain an audience and train them and give them stuff that they can use. What I've left. If you're just entertaining them. You're [00:03:00] comedian. If you're just training them, your teacher, if you want to get to their soul. And they can smile or cry or laugh and they can apply your information. Then you are what I call a true inspirational speaker.
Milton: [00:03:16] Wow
Nigel: [00:03:17] sometimes. And you'll know this from a preaching point of view, a preacher will share a message and use God's words and the Bible, the problem is they don't know how to apply it. So the preacher gets off on it. He's excited or she, and it's great, but there's gotta be something where someone says and look at Isaiah chapter seven, verse two. Well, you've left the room to think about the verse and I think, well, how do I apply that in my life? So you've got to be really careful if you want to really be passionate lock-in and really say your stuff.
Milton: That's amazing, but there's also, there's another step to that about you [00:04:00] and it's that you challenge people in a way that it forces them to move toward it, forces them to get comfortable with being uncomfortable. And I think you like putting people in that position, because I think that's where growth really begins, but there's a point to that. But I don't know how old you are, but I'm a little bit older. Okay. Okay. Was it your age? I was applause orientated and now I'm results orientated.
Milton: Wow. That's very powerful.
Nigel: So as a motivational speaker, you and I both want the accolade. We want these testimonies. We want to be seen that we have changed their lives and that we're like, God, and we've struck them down with an insight. If you're doing that, you're a taker. If you're giving information to make them make your choices, they weren't always like you. And let me just share from a business point of view, if they don't like me, but their lines work, I get rebooked. If they [00:05:00] really liked me, I get a standing ovation, but nothing changes in their business. I don't get rebooked. So you might get a high in bulk for me for your delivery. And you might be sharing some great poetry and you might even do a summit at the end, I think grades, and you might even have a sub story that's inspiration on your mother died of cancer. And then your brothers got stuck in a in a canal and I didn't get my I'm from Mexico and there's some story. I'm not sure what the company who's paying you is going to benefit from that speech. I get that it's inspirational, but there's a bit which says someone is wanting to write a check for your fee or the company wants to get some value from it. Right. So don't worry if I don't like me, I'm interested. Does device change behavior or the company prosper, but you've got to have big kahunas for that because sometimes I don't get a standing ovation.I do three weeks [00:06:00] later when I'm not there.
Milton: [00:06:00] That's powerful wanting this.
Nigel: [00:06:03] That's the best thing I've ever heard when you can let go of ego. Sorry. Have you heard of the words, ego and emotion ego, take both ease out of both words and you get, go in motion. But our ego gets in the way and our emotion gets in the way. And what happens is we get stuck that we need to look good. I've used the F word on stage. I've used the C word on stage. You know, I'm not racist. I don't do religious jokes, whatever, but there are times I've lost it or the audience will go, he was passionate. He was a Bain your face. No, one's going to book me for my story. They're going to book me for the results that I create.
Milton: That's very powerful. That's very powerful. So you said something else that was powerful in one of your speeches and you were talking about people aren't afraid of change. They're afraid of the uncertainty. [00:07:00]
Nigel: Look, if you think of the last year, would you agree? We've had massive change. Massive, massive. Okay, but we had massive change. I assume. I don't know how old you are, but okay. But in 1998, that was what 2000. And everyone was really worried about the computer crash or whatever. That was tremendous. So that was a change in the world. Then we have, that's going to change the world in his shopping. We've managed all that. What we struggle with is what uncertainty looks like. So when people don't feel secure, when we feel vulnerable, when we don't have 71 security, we panic. So, if you can say to people, you can deal with change, you can lose your mother, you can lose your brother, you can lose relatives, but what you struggle with, what's it going to look like if I've got to leave college, if I've got to leave my job, if I've got to become an Uber driver and you won't know that part of my story that I'll have as an Uber [00:08:00] driver in my Bentley.
Milton: [00:08:01] Oh, I do know that story. That's what I was going to. I do that I'm very well, but here's the point?
Nigel: [00:08:07] The change of circumstance would be having the Bernie wasn't the issue. It was the uncertainty about providing for my family. The minute I opened the back door of my car and let passengers in, I was only money. So we've, we can adapt to change. It's the uncertainty that keeps us.
Milton: It's very true. It's more, it's most very true. And the thing is that's. Everyone hears the word Uber now. And it's a household name, but when you were doing that, it wasn't an Uber there. Wasn't Uber didn't exist.
Nigel: Well, I'm doing the talk of driving that you, when you were in college, rang up at two in the morning when you were pissed from alcohol.I wasn't doing executive car. I was picking. Yeah. It'd be probably 11 o'clock at night to provide for my family. No, I don't use some of those stories in my speech because I don't know how that's going to help my audience. However, if I [00:09:00] was talking about change, I might bring that story in. Well, I want you to, I do want you to bring that story in because to me, looking at the life that you live and the success as being a serial entrepreneur and being. And the reason that you were in your Bentley was because of the the economical turn that the economy crashed. And that's what you were, you were you, you, your life literally changed. And then the fact that you were in a Bentley doing a job like that, it almost shows that no, it doesn't almost shows it. It shows that you didn't have any ego. You had an ego under control at a very early part of your life. I left school before I was 16. So I still have no formal education, but you also find your first business when you were 17. Well, no, I, I worked for two years. Then I went to Israel to do hotel management and realized that wasn't for me play tennis coach tennis, which is where my coaching background came in. And then when I came back [00:10:00] from Israel, I saw an advert for a business that I knew about. He wanted me to join him and I said, look, I'll become a partner of yours. He had $15. And I said, I'll be the manager of that business. Four years later, I paid him $2.3 billion for his 51%. Wow. Because I knew the business. What I learned later was I didn't know how to lead and manage my people. Now, if I knew dad, what I knew, then I'd be a multi, multi multimillionaire. Now I just have an MBA by the way. Your bank account. Yeah. But seriously, there's a phrase that says we lead people, but we manage things. Most of us think we're managers of people, you can't manage people. You can manage this podcast. You can [00:11:00] manage the process, but all you can do is lead me and I can lead you. I didn't know that when I was 25, 26, because I hadn't learned leadership. It's only. 20 years old that I understand that if you want to lead people to success, you need to show them the way you need to model them the way you need to be passionate along the way. And then they combine to that. So when I was in my last business, it all went wrong. I was the only thing I had left was my company car. Which was my Bentley and I had blue ball, Bernie and I had two children, one of which had special needs, and I was paying thousands of dollars a month for physiotherapy. I either had a choice of becoming what I call BMW, which is bitch mode. Or I use my Bentley to use it, to take passages, get paid. And then have a bit more success. And [00:12:00] eventually when I got my self financing back, I resigned for my own business. With what books money? No, this was virtually a public company. We had an IPO, we had venture capital in my business and I walked out with one book's money and started all over again from home. And you could only do that. If you believe in yourself, you trust yourself. And I don't know your marital status, but you have a partner who believes in you. That's huge. I don't, you know, I have a wife who is absolutely amazing. I mean, she's the total opposite, you know, we'll talk about animals in a minute. You know, I'm a monkey, she's abrasive elephant. I mean, off the child, she's structured. She's regimental. She's a clinical psychotherapist. She has a process. I have nothing. I have one piece of paper. My notes from today, four hours. That's it. That's my notes. I'll take you with me. That's the worst, man. I left it here. [00:13:00] So you have to think, you know, do you have the cult evidence today, know yourself well enough, you know, to be true to yourself, you need to know yourself. Most of us don't really get to bottom line of who we are. And I found out a long time ago. I'm good, but I need support a brilliant. But could be phenomenal. I'm not phenomenal, but I don't know enough. So I have coaches, I have most of my partners. I've trusted people who know everything about me. That's amazing. That's amazing about that. You see about that in your books. I'm working on that. Most definitely. I'm working on those, what you call mastermind alliances. And those are definitely the things that I need to start establishing. Networks like clubhouse. It really being helped me penetrate that a little bit. Well, there's a phrase that says you have to do it by yourself and you cannot do it alone. That's a very powerful, and that's a very truthful you and I both want to get this podcast that you need to have someone to interview. And I need someone who can record it. [00:14:00] I have a podcast every Monday, but I've a polar Neil who does all the work. I, I just talk rubbish, but you know, but we had a two weeks, two weeks ago, you know, the we are the worlds, you know, the song for That was done for Ethiopia, you know, when there was the famine. Yeah. So where it all started was from a guy called Bob mid-year bit was my guest four weeks ago, just before Christmas. And he wrote the song, do they know it's Christmas? Okay. So I had him as a guest next week. I've just, I've just interviewed one of the world economic advisors to the world. And what he's told us is we are in, for a boob for years. I want to have partners who can, I can bring home to add value. So they don't just hear my voice that's and that's exactly what I'm, what I'm trying to do as well.
Milton: Cause it's, it's, it's very powerful. It's very powerful having those alliances and having those people that believe in you. Even when you don't believe in yourself to [00:15:00] push you to that next level, you said something in your book.
Nigel: The impact code, basically about how two minds are more powerful than one. You get a more powerful mind when you have two minds, he put together, but that I wrote, which I don't off the top quarter, 10 heads are better than one tiny ass. This was another one of your books. So when you boss to bullied you boast. And what you're looking for, a people who are better than you at certain things that you trust 100%. So one of my most opponent monster, my opponent's gone to Jeff Ram. We do a double act on stage to, I often open a conference. He does the session off the lunch, and then we come together to talk about the perfect day we have ever rehearsed it properly. We don't worry who says the most, we just trusted each other. We could deliver. When you have total trust your life changes. Now, the bit you don't know about me is three years ago, I had a brain aneurism. [00:16:00] I want you to visualize this. It's December the 22nd. I have a brain dead. You are someone. I have a full diary from January, which a major code please. All of my work, I just gave to Jeff. And I said to all of my clients, Jeff will deliver and he'll be phenomenal. And if he isn't phenomenal, I'll pay his fee. Wow. Jeff didn't ask me for any money. He didn't ask for my contracts. He just turned out delivered. And obviously I paid him, but I've, but the following year, every one of my clients rebooked me. Because they wanted me to speak last year. Jeff's wife had cancer and he couldn't be there for two of his gigs. And this was the phone call Nigel. I can't attend next week. I went, tell me what you do.
Milton: Wow. That's very powerful
Nigel: because we have an Alliance. You have to associate itself with two or three [00:17:00] other people that are so good. You'll guarantee their fee. And if you wouldn't guarantee the fee, you shouldn't recommend them the same as if you have a podcast and you're going to put these people out and they're representing your brains. If you don't believe I can add value doodle, interview them or never publish it. So if you don't publish it, because it's your brain, it's yours. It's going out with you, each of you to people in two years. And I've got my third person. In a couple of weeks time. Cause I'm really tough on the people I interview because it's my brain. It is, it is. We've got to something who do I love enough to know. I could recommend them. That would Jeff stayed in my house when I wasn't here. Wow. This is amazing. I said, I'll tell you where the keys, the house is. Yours. Do what you need to do, obviously in a hospital. That's called [00:18:00] toper trust. There were a few people, would you not just have to trust is like being pregnant. What do you believe that do you trust or you don't trust and you either all pregnant or you're not pregnant? You code trust it a little bit. So when I work with my clients, if I don't have total trust, I don't want to have to share my slides in advance. I don't want to have to go there and go through a run through. I'm not too big for a run- through, but I know what I'm going to deliver. If the client doesn't trust me, I don't want to speak if there's not cameras chocolate on stage. I'm not speaking. If there's not diet Coke, I'm not speaking. And you've earned that you earned that. I've, I've, I've owned it by reputation that I'm putting everything on the line. That if you don't like my speech don't pay and I've been doing this 23 years, I started to two and a half billion people. I've based up a couple of [00:19:00] times. I've only once never been paid when all the technical stuff didn't work, but I've never not been paid on stage.
Milton: This is amazing. This is amazing. Other, my stripes by doing lots of what I call showcases.
Nigel: So if I was to give you one piece of advice, have you ever done a free speech? No, I have not done a pre speech. Okay. Okay. You'll never, ever going to do a free speech. You'll do a showcase, but you're never going to do a free speech. Because free and you're bullied since noteworthy free means you don't value me. But if there were 700 chief executives in a room, I do that as a showcase, but I'm not doing it for free. So I'm going to have a list of requirements that says. I want diet Coke on stage. I will campus chocolate and I want you just to trust me.And I will finish in 41 minutes and 59 seconds. This isn't medicine.
Milton: This is really amazing. And I [00:20:00] know me. I know because I do, I do stand up comedy. I know a hardest to be on stage and keep that mental clap what you're talking about. And I know by the way, you're, you're naming off those numbers because you don't play with words. So I know you don't play with time that you are going to hit that 41 fit. That's amazing.
Nigel: Well, there's been a couple of times when I've not because of interactions that have gone on, and I have seeks permission from the lines in the audience. And so they're the dynamic people. They're the people you've got a short attention span who want to be somewhere else. So if the speech is going to go longer, I will seek permission from a group of people in the room to say, I need seven more minutes. Do I have permission? This is amazing. They will always say yes. These people. And I have the chief monkey officer. We didn't even know what the time was. Okay. So we're not worried, but there is someone maybe who's organizing a lunch or dinner [00:21:00] that says we're ladling soup at 1159. Cause you Americans right lunch early. You can't last till 1230. You're like wanting lunch. But if, but I've told organizes, you could get the soup hot soup on the plates at 1150, cause I'll be finished, but should I need seven minutes more? I will seek permission. I never assume permission. And I don't ever want to play the game where I thought it was all going to, in case that we would be okay, I'm not bigger than the event. I'm not bigger than the church service. I'm not bigger than the synagogue. I'm not bigger than the most. I'm just, I supplier I'm just part of the process. Too many speakers thing, you know, they've got, they've won an Olympic medal. They've climbed the mountain. They're much more important. I want to be rebooked by the organizer as well as the company. If you piss off an organizer or a Bureau, you will never [00:22:00] get, we booked. Usually you've done comedy. If there's a comedy act after you and you take it to his seven to 12 minutes, forget about it. Well, you're going to have two problems. The other comics never going to recommend you. The audience might be laughing, but the organism is it's out of sync. And then they're not going to go to the bowl for their drinks, which is where the revenue is. So when you're doing a speech and it's a sharp Mister, and it's the supplier's there and it eats into lunchtime and they call go around the exhibition, you've pissed off thousands. This is true. This is true. So.
Milton: Nigel. You told me that about the coaches that you currently have, but I want to go back a little bit and talk about some of the mentors you had, maybe when you were younger, because I want to know what inspired that, like this energy that you have, and you didn't just develop it in the last 20 years.You'd probably be more from this, your whole entire life. Am I right?
Nigel: Okay. So I got to go. I you've made me think about something that I haven't thought about it years. [00:23:00] I come from a Jewish background and I used to go to a Jewish summer camp. My parents sent me for four weeks. I was eight and they sent me for four weeks. That's unusual in England. Nobody goes for longer than two weeks. I know in America you do caves for weeks. So I was sent for a month. Okay. My parents didn't come down to the third Sunday. You know, any I'm very well, we're a small country, so it's not far to go. But when I was 10, I was put in charge of the tuck shop. In order to, you know, like a sweet chump.
Milton: Yeah.
Nigel: Okay. But I went with Tony who was the camp odor to a caching camera, but like a Costco to buy stock. And I've only just thought about it that he trusted me to run his store and we dealt with, this was probably this wasn't like paperwork. I mean, this was real. And he empowered me to make decisions. Wow. I, then I think I learned then [00:24:00] that I enjoyed dealing with the public. I enjoyed being in business. When I was 14, I worked on a market selling women's clothing, and I will be able to tell that if your brother was coming towards me, we were selling Jean skirts with petticoats underneath. I would know your mama was a size 12 and people would be amazed. I would just know I had a bunny belt. So I was taking money and I enjoyed the interaction with people before I was 16. So I left school June the 15th. My birthday is July. The second I left school, June the 15th, and I started working June the 16th. For a fashion house. Okay. Okay. Judy and management, and this guy trusted me to do certain things. So I've either shown passion or I've been given trust. And I said to you this, before you eat the trust people or you don't, I was always given trust until I [00:25:00] let them down. Well, I've never let anyone down with trust. So I know when I work, even when I'm working with you, I don't know where this is going. I don't know how you're going to edit this. I don't know if you're going to cut me out halfway through my interview because you could make me look really silly on that basis. Trust you to deliver phenomenal illness.
Milton: Yes.
Nigel: Then I can beat my second self. I mean, I'll have thought about Tony Brown at summer camp. When I was the lead, you know, my boss was a guy called Joseph Rivage who used to leave with George at 17, 18 years old to run his finance company. And he would go back to Germany where his mother was and rang me up and saying, do I need to come back and stay in there?
Milton: Wow.
Nigel: when so something that I put out stayed on trustworthy.
Milton: [00:25:52] This is impressive.
Nigel: [00:25:53] When I work with organizations, I just want to show you, this is normally the one thing I take with me. [00:26:00] It's a big worry stick. Okay. That's my whole equipment. Plus a phone. I don't have any, I don't have a car. I don't have a car. No, what's a laptop. Remember, I'm just saying, you know, I don't do detail. Okay. I have people that provide slides. My, I have someone who sent the CEO of my organization. Who's the chief elephant officer. Her job is to provide all the slides. She'll send information. She sends contracts. I don't know what a contract looks like. I wouldn't even know how to send you a contract. If you were to send me, I need you to sign a waiver. I say you got to send it to her. I don't know. I don't even know what it is. I know what I'm good at. This is actually where most speakers get it wrong. I know what I'm good at. And I know I'm not good at it. Are you aware of what a SWOT analysis?
Milton: [00:26:53] Yes, I am. Yep. Strengths, weaknesses.
Nigel: [00:26:56] You know what happens if you work on your weaknesses,
Milton: [00:26:59] they [00:27:00] become strengths. Yeah,
Nigel: [00:27:01] no, no. If you work on your weaknesses, you get strong weaknesses you will do is work on your strengths there. What's interesting about your bank of mine. I think I'm in the top four in Europe, in leadership and communication. I think up at the top 62 million for after Dennis speaking. One. I don't like it. It's too late. You need to understand we're at hopper seven here. Okay. Ever do anything after five o'clock. Okay. So this is the exception. I appreciate it. I would want to be speaking live at an event at this time, do it. Okay. But I definitely wouldn't want to be doing after dinner. That is a skill, which I didn't have, but now get ready for this let's suppose I really learn over the next two years to be an after Dennis weaker. I just told you [00:28:00] I was 62 billion in the world of it. If I really practice hard, I get to 9 million, but I think I'll be the top four, which is a bit like in your playoffs for football. It is the playoffs every year. If I can get just that little bit better. And then I get to the final, there's a chance of a ring. If I can get to be the finalist, but whether I'm first, second, third, or fourth as the material, that's funny, you're in the playoffs. You're a good player. Would you agree? I agree, but you don't want to be in the top 40 million. Tell me a sport. You're not good at a sport.
Milton: [00:28:39] I'm not good at basketball.
Nigel: [00:28:42] Okay. Spend the next year and see if you make the playoffs again. But tell me the thing you love the most. What's the thing you do. I love to just the martial arts students. You spent the next year with a great jujitsu in a danger with a great coach. [00:29:00] How far could you go?
Milton: [00:29:01] Yeah, you're right. You're right. I could, I could rank in the world. It's probably, yeah.
Nigel: [00:29:05] You know, to whether you get to the black belt, whether you get to first and second hand, but you're not going to get it in basketball. People are pursuing something. They're not that good at, because someone's told them work on your weaknesses.
Milton: [00:29:18] This is true. This is very true. And I was looking for my notes because part of what you said, follow greatness, right? Then that's more of that. So that's the key to getting to that next level, surround yourself with greatness, surrond yourself but find
Nigel: [00:29:33] out what you're passionate about, what you're really good at, but get better.
Milton: [00:29:38] Get better at it. Get better,
Nigel: [00:29:40] but you know, the top coaches, the top football players, the top golfers, the top tennis players have phenomenal coaches, the people who really need the coaches or the people at the bottom end, but they can't afford it. But the top top people, if you invested $20,000 in coaching in [00:30:00] whatever business you wanted to do, it would give you a hundred thousand of extra income, but you've got to be able to afford the 20,000.
Milton: [00:30:07] Yeah.
Nigel: [00:30:08] But most people say, well, I can't afford it. You can't not afford it. That's the point. Yeah, this is true. This is very true. You know, if you want to speak or you want to preach, or you want to do film editing, you've got to go to the next level. Then you've got to go to the next level. But what happens is we think we're good. Then we stop notice that this is true. Become complacent. You know, Djokovich is the number one player he's just overtaken. Federer had been the number one player for the longest amount of time. And he still has coaches. The coaches he's playing with are better than me at tennis. So do you know the difference between a coach and a mentor by the way?
Milton: [00:30:45] This is a great, so a mentor actually, I'm guessing. Cause I don't know, but I'm trying to, I'm taking a stab at it. I think a coach is someone that kind of guides you along.
Nigel: [00:30:55] And kind of shows you the right way to do things and push to do a mentor, kind of like, [00:31:00] like oversees your progress maybe. Well, I've been to, it's normally been there and a coach can support you to get there. So David Leadbetter, who's one of the best golf coaches in the world. Never one to be open. Okay, but he's a phenomenal coach, but someone like Nick found wisdom, Stephie bounce stairs, they could have been big mentors to other young golfers. We should go for change because the 70 bounced Steris palai changed Brazilian football because they saw the way forward.
Milton: [00:31:31] Great coach. So lots of bandages out. Sometimes don't bring their appliance, but some coaches are phenomenal, but Oh, gray hitting the ball. A great coach to lots of businesses. I don't even understand what they do, but I can coach them in changing the way they apply their business about their mindset, about the way they communicate. But I can be able to talk to other speakers cause I've run a successful squeaky business. I've [00:32:00] written five books. I've missed out. I've done things because I've been there. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
Nigel: [00:32:06] So you've got to find some big doors who've been in your shoes and you've got to find some coaches that can train you in your style.
Milton: [00:32:14] That's amazing. That's great advice. Thank you very much for that. And another thing that I realized in watching you and. Listen to your speeches as there there's zookeeper approach. I think that gives you an advantage because I've seen you do it while I was watching you, how the lion mask off and I, and the things that you were saying about the law, I was actually thinking. And then he went to the element. I could see the reaction to the room that the outfits were thinking exactly what you said, but what was the amazing Nigel is that there's so many people in that room with so many different approaches and how they consume information. But yet when you're presenting, you're giving one speech, but you're talking to all of them.
Nigel: [00:32:54] Can I share another example for you please? The book, the four [00:33:00] languages. Wow. So for the monkeys, there's lots of things. The joke on the very first page, which says, if you go to the zoo or take something to feed the animals, even if the science is don't feed the animals, remember it, wasn't the animals that put the signs up. But the lions, not many words on each page because they're very busy people. Wow. And then I get ready for this, for the elephants.
Milton: [00:33:35] Wow. That is interesting to go one stage further for the dolphins. We printed this on recycled paper.
Nigel: [00:33:45] So think about how I've done this, that I'm sharing of a method I'm showing of the method that understanding the methods too often as speakers, we're speaking in our language, which is why, when you hear some [00:34:00] pastors getting very excited on stage praise, the Lord, hallelujah, touch, you know, that's their language. There's a whole group of people going well. I'd like to identify exactly where Jesus was buried. Did he go? Did he have fall? Did he carry the cross? It's not possible. He could have carried the cross and I lived in Israel and there was a handprint in Jerusalem where Jesus apparently stoked to me. I don't believe that's his hand print. Okay. Because it, it just doesn't seem possible. But if I was an elephant, I'd want to know that who prints too big for Jesus' hand. Okay. As a bunkie, I think he was pretty good. We found it. So even whatever your religion, whatever your state, the speeches, there's a group of people listening to your speech with a different context where they're hearing. So, you know, we all bantering because we've got a bit of a on here. Okay. You would want to do the proof of everything that I've just shared. And I can give you [00:35:00] loads of proof about Socrates five 30, two BC, our stuff I'll call you. I can give you all the stuff where the communication comes from. But as a dolphin, I've got to be a bit more gentle. And ask you about how your relationships are as your mother, because that's important. And you've got to know how to do that on stage. Now, you know, you're one of the suites that you saw that I did. There's 6,000 people there. I know there's a thousand people there who don't believe a word I'm saying, unless they've got proof.
Milton: [00:35:31] That's amazing.
Nigel: [00:35:32] Most people, everyone, I think you'll find, cause they'll be gone. What I'd done. I don't agree. Well, now you've just lost a big chunk of the audience. So you better make sure that you've got the evidence to share, you know, for everyone to say everyone loves Jesus. No, everyone does just for the record, but you've put it out there now. You've just upset 500 people. Yeah. If you want everyone to touch your neighbor, I don't want to touch my neighbor. [00:36:00] This is true. This is brilliant. So, so you have to start thinking as a speaker, as a preacher, as a teacher, can you engage with your audience? Do you know your audience? Do you even understand your audience and you know what what's going on for them?
Milton: [00:36:16] And if you do, there's a chance of success. Yeah, they're right. And I can even see how you can even apply this to comedy as well. It's very transfers over any kind of speaking public speaking, you're doing a transfers over.
Nigel: [00:36:28] every disaster good comic could make fun of. Yeah, but sometimes you've got to think about the timing, you know, after nine 11, there was a comedian who had to go first to do something funny about doing 11. Yeah. We had a comedian in the UK who says off to the Iraq war. Okay. The good thing about America and England, we're going to be great of the Paralympics. Oh my gosh, but you see at some point that's what people were [00:37:00] thinking, but someone's going to go first with it. You wouldn't want to do it the day off the nine 11. You wouldn't want to do it the day after you watch 700 Americans coming back, your body banks, but there's fun and everything. You can make light of something, providing the audience are ready for it. This is true. So you've got to trust yourself all you away, where the represents, you know, I, I did a conference for a major focus in school, and I knew that 400 people in the audience were being made redundant.
Milton: [00:37:33] Oh, really?
Nigel: [00:37:35] So I wasn't going to do a big motivational speech, man, help the company reach his goals and all the rest I was talking about wherever you are in your life, you need to take responsibility life. Doesn't always go your way. And when it doesn't go your way, you need to step up and own it. The wow. And three days later, everyone went as a basic, I thought you were personally speaking to me. Wow. [00:38:00] That's powerful. Well, because you need to know a little bit about the organization. That's one of the problems that if you have a blanket speech, do you know what a blanket speeches, it's a speech you do regardless of the situation. So if you're an Olympian, so we have a, I have a friend who's an Olympic runner that beat the Americans in 1991 in the relay race. Oh, really? Actually speech and the fastest man went first on the slowest. Man went last that's contradiction. Okay. And to the 400 meter runner, who's the slavish guy went last, but he knew if I had a good enough headstart, he would be at an overtake or the ed band, but he does the same speech regardless of the conference, but that's just his style. I want to look at an audience and think. Yeah, we got COVID we're coming out of COVID. You know, we've got, you know, the England, you know, we're on our second vaccination very soon. I'm working with [00:39:00] travel agents right now. I've got a, I've got a friend who runs a cruise business. The whole cruise industry is absolutely destroyed. So you can't do a motivational speech. Hey, let's get on that boat and let's rock it. Just isn't going to work. So you have to start thinking, how can I make my speech applicable without losing my soul?
Milton: [00:39:18] Oh, wow. These are gems. are we getting close? So I do want to ask you one really important question because it was very profound when I read it in your book.
Nigel: [00:39:32] Small stone, big ripple. You were saying it change doesn't have to be does it have to be huge? Very small change can be lasting and impactful and a small change can have enormous results. Can you explain, well,
Milton: [00:39:47] let me give you an example. I must've said something on clubhouse that resonated with you and I couldn't see you. Yeah.
Nigel: [00:39:54] So what I share on clubhouse, so I share on a group chat. I [00:40:00] want to give some advice that you leave thinking. I didn't necessarily agree with everything he said, but that makes some sense. I want to investigate a bit more. Do you think everything I said was great, cause it just called me everyone to agree. I think I'm a bit like at American buffet table, you've been he's American buffets. You been to these other places. I think that's what I'm like. There's a lot to offer and it's up to you. What you want to take now. In fact stuff, there's some sweet stuff or there's some amazing stuff. Look at the site. Well, I don't want to be just one so long steak. That's amazing. I'd say you have to make a decision. I'm not going to be a buffet table, which means you might not like the salad or you might, but there's got to be something on the table you can align. So I'm not asking you to eat [00:41:00] all of it. If you don't like salad, then leave it. But don't say I wasn't any good. You just didn't like that part too many speakers are trying to be filet, steak, or give too much. So I tell people if you love me, but don't change, I've failed and you change behavior. I've succeeded. And I love you all and take what you like and let go. And so I've often sat on stage, let it go, let it go to the stuff you don't like. Don't hold old to that bit that you didn't like. So let me give you a really good quote. Resentment is like taking poison and hoping the other person dies.
Milton: [00:41:45] I shouldn't be laughing, but this the way you say things, it's so true. It's so leech of lifestyles of the rich and famous. Okay. I know our time is out.
Nigel: [00:41:57] If I could support you, just [00:42:00] ask and whatever I can do to support your listeners delighted too. Most definitely. And so what I'll do is This will be released in the episode within two weeks from this. But before that I'll start a campaign, I'll be pushing out stuff. So you'll be sharing as well, if that's okay with you.
Milton: [00:42:13] Yeah. It's most definitely most definitely. And you'll definitely know when it's being aired earlier on YouTube, it'll be live like this, and it'll also be on anchor, which will populate. So iTunes, Spotify, I'll send you all that information. But like I said, I really appreciate you taking the time.
Nigel: [00:42:25] This was was excellent. Good. I love that. What's good. You love it. Awesome. You were great. You gave the best answer with the what's good. He does. What just exactly I wanted you to do. It was great. This was awesome. Was a collaboration. And I really appreciate you.
Milton: [00:42:41] Thank you.
Nigel: [00:42:41] My pleasure. Have a wonderful afternoon. So may it be a wonderful evening for dinner? We have nine 44. I appreciate it. Good. You take care.
